Wednesday, June 4, 2008

If I don't get over my inability to masturbate in my parents' house soon, I am going to LOSE MY FREAKING MIND.
I've considered committing suicide, but now that I've seen how much it hurt my family when someone we cared about did it, I get sick just thinking about doing something like that. The people who do it, or want to do it, clearly haven't been close to someone who has.
Songs are great. They allow me to sing my secret...and yet still keep it a secret.

"My friends say-
They’re proud of me-
For taking our break up-
So casually-
But they don’t see-
What lies beneath my smile-

It appears-
That I’m okay-
That I moved on-
When you walked away-
But the truth is-
Since you said goodbye-

I’m invisibly shaken-
And quietly breakin’-
Desperately takin’ one breath at a time-
Beneath this composure-
I know it’s over-
Baby I’m dying cause you can’t be mine-
But I will never show the toll it’s taken-
Cause I’m invisibly shaken-"
I like you. You have a girlfriend. And that sucks.
I know you're missing him and not me. But I miss you more than ever these days.

Could you imagine a year ago we'd be here? I couldn't.
i used to think you would stop loving me if you knew all my secrets. but really it's just brought us closer together. i don't need to be mystery girl anymore.
For the first time I'm in a relationship and have no inkling of a feeling to wonder what it would be like with someone else. No other crushes, I don't even look at the others on the street and fantasize about them. I can only think about YOU. I love the feeling, but at the same time it scares me - could you really be the one I've been waiting for? We have a long and hard road ahead of us...I guess we'll see.
I'm afraid Obama won't live up to the hype if he's elected president, but I know that isn't a popular opinion w/ our generation, so I usually keep my mouth shut in political conversations.
I don't have feelings for you anymore. It took me awhile, but the inevitable finally hit me: we'll never be as close as we were, and I'll always think less of you for how you treated me. In the end, I AM glad we're still pretty good friends.
I hate that you gave your new girlfriend a pet name.
My parents treat my sister and I differently. It's very clear my dad likes her better. I'm sure they love us the same, but for some reason he ignores me when she's around. It really hurts my feelings.
Im drunk right now and the one thing im completely sure of is that i love my friends and that the fun i have with tthem is work all this trouble, and all the time apart. so what if i never find any soul mate, these people are my ones to live for.
For what it's worth, I know I'm not the most perfect, best-looking man on the planet Earth. And not even at UNC. But I feel like I deserve something, anything. I just need to crash into someone, connect for just a moment. I'm sick of being alone.
I have been a very responsible, moral person my whole life. I used to believe that someday I would be thankful for it and see the benefit. But, now I'm starting to wonder. Is it worth it? Am I missing out more than I am gaining?

Comment Here To Submit A Secret 6/4/08