Monday, May 12, 2008
Part of me is still in love with my ex-boyfriend from years ago. Most of me is in love with my current boyfriend. Why, no matter how hard I try or no matter the length of time separating our relationship, does that part of me still exist?
No one understands why I still love him. He knows me better than anyone. But why can't I forget him? Why can I still feel his lips on mine? Why do I still, on sleepless nights such as these, finally find peace imagining his arms around me? Why can't I be satisfied?
I love my boyfriend. I do. How do I stop these thoughts? I don't know how much longer I can take it. This part of my heart, although relatively small, dominates my thoughts. But, why?
No one understands why I still love him. He knows me better than anyone. But why can't I forget him? Why can I still feel his lips on mine? Why do I still, on sleepless nights such as these, finally find peace imagining his arms around me? Why can't I be satisfied?
I love my boyfriend. I do. How do I stop these thoughts? I don't know how much longer I can take it. This part of my heart, although relatively small, dominates my thoughts. But, why?
I graduated today. And I can't help feel sad. I never had the guts to tell the guy that I've liked for the past 2 years, how much I love him.And now it's too late. How do you know if a guys likes or even loves you back? It's so hard. One day I am hopeful and the next I am not hopeful. I am so scared of rejection that I fear that I'll let go of all the people I may think I am in "love" with in my life eventually. And that I will end up all alone.
I didn't really LOVE college. I don't know why! I feel like a freak, and it looks like everyone else loved it. I had friends, did really well in my classes, did a ton of activities. Carolina was great, the best university ever. But I'm sort of indifferent about leaving it all. Maybe in a few months it will really hit me?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)