Wednesday, May 14, 2008

It's not that I don't want to hang out with you. It's just that if we go to that place, we'll probably run into your girlfriend. Then I'll remember why you and I aren't that close in the first place.


(You didn't want me. I still think about it every day.)
I used to not remember my dreams. It was funny how I'd wake up and have no recollection of anything.

But these past few months I have... and I hardly ever have happy dreams. I didn't think it was possible to wake up with such negative and crappy feelings every day.

I don't understand why. I'm a happy person. Why can't I just dream happy? It's really starting to get to me.
i wanted you to spend your last night in chapel hill with me. I guess you had better people to spend it with.
Please don't come visit if you're having sex with someone else. I know you like me, why are you so afraid of only being with one person?
since i met him, i have cheated on every boyfriend i've ever had with him.
but, it feels more like i'm cheating on him with every boyfriend i've ever had.

i love you more than anyone, but i won't tell you.

i'm scared i will never learn how to be faithful.
I graduated three days ago, and it already depresses me that I can no longer watch TV, hang out with, or talk frequently with my roommate. Having to move and grow up really sucks at this moment.

Mainly, I just miss my friend.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/14/08

I am sleeping with someone you know well. You know we are doing it, just admit it to yourself and let me leave you.

It's just so screwed up that I think you'll be proposing soon.

I'm going to say no, it's just not fair to you.
I keep getting uglier as I get older.
I can't stop thinking about last night. But I don't think it meant anything to you.
Every time I read a secret about someone being secretly in love with a good friend, I pretend its you.

But I'm pretty sure you have no idea this website exists.
I wish you would get over me and just leave me behind... its makes me sad that you are feeling so upset about us breaking up. i kind of want to get back with you so you wont feel so bad, but that would be out of pity and you wouldn't want that... would you?
1 year at UNC showed me that not everyone is in it for themselves.

Thanks.
Two years ago, a girl accused me of getting her pregnant. Not knowing what to do, and respecting her decision to keep the child, I asked her to marry me.

It turned out that she wasn't pregnant, and never had been.

So when you wonder why I'm distant and fear commitment, it's because the biggest commitment of my life was based upon a lie.
I'm afraid that without even thinking about it I just ruined the best thing that ever happened to me.
You only like me when you have exhausted the search to find a reason not to.