Instead of getting into a fight and telling you exactly how much you hurt me, I decided to let you go. I can't hold on anymore.

As much as it hurts, I know I made the right decision.

I stayed online for hours hoping that you will message me, but you never do. I check my phone all the time hoping that I have a text from you, but I never do. I try so hard to convince myself that I'm fine with us just being friends, but I don't know how to change the way I feel toward you. I wish you missed me the same way that I miss you.

I really think we're meant to be together. I think you know it too. Why are you so scared?

I've dreamed about you the last few nights in a row. I know they don't mean anything, but I'm amused and saddened that even in my dreams my feelings for you are so clearly unrequited (and that feelings I thought I'd kicked to the curb are rearing their ugly heads again).

We broke up over a year ago. We've each dated other people since then. Yet you still keep hoping we'll somehow end back up together. Why can't you understand that until you get past the idea of "us", we won't even be able to be friends?

when i found out you died this morning in a car wreck i went into shock. I've been reading all of our old and recent messages to each other online and I don't think it's completely sunk in that you're gone...

that the next time I message you online you won't ever be there to respond again.

I hope where you are there's a beautiful beach and a big, friendly dog you can call your own....I know you'll want to be there forever. I do hope wherever you are you're happy....I miss you and love you, buddy....thank you for making me see that the moon is really so beautiful....

I wish you understood that when we hang out what I ACTUALLY want is for you to just cuddle with me. Because I think you would if you figured it out.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/16/08