Monday, May 12, 2008

I had a ridiculous crush on one of my professors all year. It helped to distract me from things going on around me that I didn't want to deal with. But I want a real relationship and am afraid that I don't know how to be in one because all my greatest love affairs have been in my head.
i realized today, as I hugged you and said goodbye, that I'm in love with you. I would give anything for this year not to be over so I would have a chance to tell you that, and so I would still at least have my friend.
I don't want to be a senior. I am absolutely terrified of graduating and leaving behind all of the amazing people that I have met over the last three years.
One of your best friends is in love with you... and I can't tell you, or anyone.
I really wished this was you:

"I'm in love with you. And before I get my diploma, I'm going to tell you."

But you got your diploma yesterday.
seeing you tonight makes me realize what a big mistake it has been for me to not act upon my feelings. I'm full of regret for not ever telling you how i feel
The real reason is because you're inconsiderate, presumptuous, pushy, and honestly, a bitch.


I only wish I could've told it to your face and made you realize: it's your own fault that it didn't happen and even though you think I'm the bad guy and try to make me feel that way, you did it to yourself.
I graduated today. And I can't help feel sad. I never had the guts to tell the guy that I've liked for the past 2 years, how much I love him.And now it's too late. How do you know if a guys likes or even loves you back? It's so hard. One day I am hopeful and the next I am not hopeful. I am so scared of rejection that I fear that I'll let go of all the people I may think I am in "love" with in my life eventually. And that I will end up all alone.
after you broke up with me, i hooked up with a random guy just to prove that guys still found me attractive. now i miss you more than ever. please come back to me...
I'm so disappointed. I expected so much more. When you ask what's wrong, I don't know how to tell you that because we both know you're not going to change.
Thank God for the summer being here and soon I won't have to talk to you much at all anymore. Because fuck this. You don't give a shit that you play games with me and I'm just feeding your fucking ego by doing this. Things aren't going to change in the fall either. Fuck that and fuck you.
I hate my vagina.
I don't know if I'm actually chubby or if I just have skewed body image.
i love you, i've loved you for years. now that you finally need me, i think i love him.
I don't really feel that bad for you. It's your own fault, and you got what you deserved. Besides, I tried to help you, and if you'd let me this wouldn't have happened.
after you told me you were gay, i took a shit in your yard... twice.
I'm going to really miss you.

I'm so scared you won't miss me the way I miss you.
I didn't really LOVE college. I don't know why! I feel like a freak, and it looks like everyone else loved it. I had friends, did really well in my classes, did a ton of activities. Carolina was great, the best university ever. But I'm sort of indifferent about leaving it all. Maybe in a few months it will really hit me?
I like coming home only for the chances of finding the perfect country boy and marrying a farmer.
I'm afraid being home will make me an angry person like I was before I came to UNC. I've moved on from everything that happened here but there's always a chance.