I give up. I'm going to take the easy way out and just be a hardened jerk.

I give up. I'm going to take the easy way out and just be a hardened jerk.

Ever since I moved out of my place in Chapel Hill, I've lost all motivation to do anything. I'm starting this "great new chapter of my life" but all I want to do is stay in bed. I have a great new job and life ahead of me, so why am I so depressed?

Comment here to submit a secret 5/29/08

Whenever you slapped my face, it hurt. But when you slapped my face, it didn't sting, so it never hurt enough to count.
I've told no one, and I'm still not sure that I have anything to tell.
They were always "accidents." Too drunk, too strong, too careless. I'm just making a big deal of nothing...right?

I'm not calling you anymore. You can call me for once.

All you have to do is smile at me, and I forget all the reasons I'm supposed to stay away from you.


I hate myself for loving you, and even more for not having the strength to walk away.

I met someone and I'm falling way too fast. I know I should rear back but I don't want to and I'm not sure I can.

Heartbreak, here I come.

I wish my boyfriend didn't smoke pot.

even though you think you got away with lying to me, a few weeks after it happened, I still know that you lied. I've known since the day the lie took place, and you still lie about it to this day...
i don't know if i can really enjoy being with you until you tell me...

Recovering from anorexia is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I need a hug.

My friend always joked that I had a crush on you. I didn't, atleast not like that. But that day we talked forever by the pit...and you told me how pretty you thought my eyes were-it hit me that I definitely like you. But we are both in serious relationships...and both very much in love with our respective partners, so I will try my best not to think about you this summer, because I'm sure you won't be thinking of me.

I slept with a guy I met only a few days ago...and I feel like I've known him for years, and I think I'm falling in love with him already. I don't want this to happen so fast, I want to be cautious...but when he cuddles me, it feels so amazing, and that feeling is what gets me through the day. I don't wnat to fall so hard so fast because I know I'll only get hurt, but at the same time, it seems like he's falling just as hard for me too, or am I imagining it. That's what is racking my brain and preventing me from sleeping. I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone, and I've only known you for a few days. I hope you feel the same, because I couldn't survive one more heartbreak right now.

I'm really mad at you for making me feel so trapped, and for still making me feel that way even though we're not together anymore.

I'm trying. I promise, I really am.

I don't want to go back to Chapel Hill next year. I'd rather just leave on a good note so my friends don't figure out how awful I am.

I orgasmed for the first time yesterday via masturbation after trying to do so for several years...

I wasn't thinking of you.

i still have my vcard--you would never guess it--but i think it's because i feel as if i dont know HOW to do the physical stuff...am i the only one who feels like this??

sometimes i wish that i had scars from it
so that everyone forever could see what you did to me

but mostly i still love you and want you (the real you, the you you were before) back

I was disappointed when I came to college and there was no telekinesis club.

I'm a guy, an I pee sitting down at home. Seriously, you dont have to turn on the light, you never have to wonder if the seat is up or down, and there is no chance of splatter.

I've recently realized that I get very nervous every time someone brings up Jews, Judaism, Israel, or anything having to do with me being a Jew. I've been raised a Jew, but I'm beginning to think that I want nothing to do with it anymore.

But if that IS true, and I start exploring other faiths, my family would be so disappointed in me...

I don't ask about your dates because I care. I ask because I'm a glutton for punishment and want to be reassured that I have a chance.

It's only been a few weeks since I've graduated from UNC and I miss it so much already! UNC was my dream school and I had an amazing time there! I guess I am just afraid that I will never have as good of a time in life as I did during these "care free" college days of mine. Everyone keeps saying that college is the best 4 years of your life. This makes me sad and nervous because it makes it seem like everything in my life is going downhill and that I'll never relive these amazing moments again.

It's so hard to believe you when you say "don't worry about it" anymore...

Last time you lied. I just want to help.

I love that my best friend's ex-girlfriend is insanely jealous of me just from looking at pictures on Facebook. I love it even more that we've hooked up twice and she has no idea.

I was told by a friend when I was young that it's good luck to eat your own scabs.
It's never seemed to bring any luck... and yet, over ten years later, I'm still doing it...

I have a totally sweet, stable, kinda nerdy boy that is totally into me and I sort of like him back after knowing him for a few years. However, the guy I really want is the witty, rude, and antagonistic hottie I met last weekend.

Sigh.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/28/08

Comment here to submit a secret 5/26/2008

Comment here to submit a secret 5/25/2008

I wish you'd call me out when I'm a jerk to you. You think that you deserve to be treated rudely by me because you hurt me, but it's not true. You deserve better. But if you don't think so, why should I?

My roomates for next year are already fucking takin advantage of me. I'm seriously on the brink of just living by myself. But I know I'll just wuss out and, once again, give in to everyone else's demands.

It was a completely normal night; I was studying. I was in a good place. And then suddenly, out of nowhere, a memory surfaces of going with you to a sketchy pizza place with our best friend and the fun we had.

Good God, why? I wasn't even feeling hungry, much less for pizza.

I've graduated and don't start my "real job" for another few months. This in between phase sucks, I just want to go ahead and START my new life.

I love Naruto. LOVE it.

Sometimes I wonder if people see through me and realize how unintelligent I actually am.

I'm not coming back in the Fall and I still haven't told my parents. I think they will kill me, but I just can't sit there in school and pretend it's right for me anymore....

I haven't slept in 4 days since I stopped taking Lorcet. I've been throwing up a lot and I tihink my parents know whats going on.

I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else.

I am in Chapel Hill, with all of these people around me. It is Memorial Day Weekend, so I should have tons of stuff to do, but I have nothing to do. It kind of sucks.

I'm getting sick of waiting for you to call.

So, instead of letting you stew over how to "let me down easy," I'm going to help you:

You didn't mean as much as you thought. Goodbye.

I don't care about:
-My grades
-My future
-How much money I'm going to owe after I leave this place.
I could graduate with a 2.4 and become nothing more than a housewife and be fine with that. I came here almost exclusively for basketball, I've somehow gotten into every game thus far (Dook included), and I know I made the right choice. But every day that goes by without Danny and Wayne and Ty un-declaring from the draft, I start to panic a little more...

Im taking it as a sign that after this fight our favorite show is on a marathon. Hope we have a marathon too.

we had sex again this morning, and i still can't make myself feel bad about it.

it feels right, and i'm sorry.

i honestly did want to get back together, but then i realized what a dick you are.

thank god it didn't take me all summer to get over you...

i dont think you realized how hurt/angry i was last night. sometimes i feel that because you are such a nice guy that i can not get angry at you, because you never intentionally do things to hurt my feelings. but my gosh, if you had called me last night, i might have exploded over the phone. you have no idea.

I really, really want to make out with someone. I'm starting to have random feelings for my guy friends that I know wouldn't be there if I wasn't so deprived.

I really miss you. More than you probably know. And Im glad I got to speak to you and embrace you before I left for the summer. I was stupid enough to walk away without getting your number. And someting makes me think that you wanted me to have it.

If someone gave me the chance to live forever, I would do it. I don't think I'd be lonely. I'm lonely now, and at least if I lived forever I'd never stop learning and seeing new things.

I think I'm getting addicted to the valium I'm prescribed, but then again I think I may be using it appropriately and just wasn't before. Its really hard to trust myself sometimes.

I'm at a university and am surrounded by intelligent, attractive girls. The m/f ratio is even in my favor. So why do I ignore them and keep trying to date girls I used to go to high school with?

I can't decide whether I'm too good, or not good enough...

We've been together for a few months now, but I'm afraid that you won't ever really love me.

I'm in love with you.

I'm afraid to say it first.

I intentionally hit on cocky guys, let them buy me drinks and even get my number. then I don't return their calls. I know it's mean, but being a former "ugly girl" I get such a rush from being able to take them down a few pegs.

I'm addicted to prolific. the pathetic part is I'm not even good at it, but I can't stop playing.

I love your eyes and your laugh and your everything. I love how comfortable we are with each other. I know that we are far from perfect together, but if anything happened to you, I would die. I love you so much-- how could I have been blind for so long? And why do I still think about him?

You messed up our perfect goodbye when you forgot to confess that you love me. I'm going to find someone new while I'm away and I hope I can forget what I thought we had.

How do you get over a 3 yr relationship? He is the love of my life and I thought he was the one...

I work for the computer labs on campus, and I really hate you assholes.

if it weren't for the pain i know i would inflict on my parents and friends... i would kill myself.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/23/08

my goal for the summer is to not fall for me.


wish me luck.

I know you hate those pictures of yourself from a few years ago because you were a little heavier.

I'm not looking at that, though. It's the same smile, and the same gorgeous eyes.

So no, I don't tell a difference.

And no, I don't think you're fat.

i'm scared that i don't love you anymore, but you're being such a dick right now that i just can't make myself give a shit.

i'm sorry that i'm cheating on you.

i missed him.

Your choice to not talk to me this summer gives me the chance to get closer to him without being afraid...and ruins your chance of anything. Sorry.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/22/08

At one point, you were my best friend. I know that we've grown apart, and I accept that. I really do. I still love you as deeply as i did before.

I wish you'd talk to me, though. I know you're in pain and I want to help. Just to listen.

Can we please become part of each others lives again? I miss you.

I listen to mugglecast. I don't know why that's so embarassing, but I go to lengths to make sure that no one knows!

I despise people who talk in "abrevs"

Even though he isn't my boyfriend (yet), I already fucking hate the girl who flirts with him constantly via his facebook wall. Get a life!

I don't hate your girlfriend. I just hate the fact that she's living the life that I was supposed to have with you. Have a great romantic-getaway at the beach this weekend. I secretly hope that you get in a wreck and that she doesn't live through it. but then karma would probably not be on my side.

I hope I have sex with so many girls this summer, or at least one, so that you won't still be my last after all these months.

i skip samson every time now.

My ex and I learned together that he likes to spank his partners/I like to get spanked. But now, I would have no idea how I would ever ask someone new to do those things to me, even though I want it so much.

I know I said I wouldn't take sides, but really? He's right. You're being a bitch.

When we both agreed it wouldn't mean anything, I desperately wanted it to mean everything to you.

I finally realized you were the one for me and everything was perfect… only a few months later you passed away unexpectedly… now I am alone to pick up the pieces… and I am afraid I won’t ever be able to move on because I will always compare others to you

I want to be a whore, and sleep with as many guys and girls as possible.

I'm just a sexual guy...

Every time we're on the phone and I tell you that I'm reading this site, it's because I've posted a secret that I don't have the nerve to say to you, and I keep hoping you'll check it out and wonder if that one is from me.

Care more.

I'm not anti-social... I'm just sick of you!

i wish i could even remotely relate to any of the posts about broken hearts and love. i want to be broken hearted!! they really are right about better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all :(

i's the basic "girl is in love with her really good guy friend scenario." i've known him since highschool, and he liked me freshman year, but it just didn't work out. we've been friends ever since. and it's not even about looks for me, he just has one of the most amazing personalities ever. and he is so driven that he inspires me to do things i never in a million years EVER thought i could do. but there's a problem: i'm pretty sure he doesn't see me the same way. and i hate it.

I don't know if I can make it through the summer without kissing a guy who liked my friend before school was over.

I'd never commit suicide, but sometimes I wonder if it'd be worth it just to make my family like me again.

Life is so complicated. And I have no answers - not one. No matter how earnestly I try to sort the world around me. No matter how much I try to make sense of the past nor how much I try to understand myself, or what's "right." Not only virtue of character, but virtue of thought.

It's so overwhelming. What I would give for the certainty and conviction of youth mixed with the experience and wisdom of age.

Does "just good friends" mean I'm way too ugly for him? Honestly? Because, that's what I say when I don't find them attractive...

Working 40 hour weeks this summer at my internship has made me kind of depressed about what the rest of my life's going to be like after I graduate.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/21/08

just because i have unrequited feelings for you doesn't mean i'm an idiot. quit looking at me like i'm going to pounce on you like a drooling puppy. geez.

I can feel myself being a huge unreasonable bitch to you all the time and still can't stop. But you always let me get away with it, so I have a hard time even feeling bad.

I feel completely alone and terrified. And I want to tell you and I want you to hold me and I know I can't because I love you too much. I can't help but want to protect you from how bad this feels. I guess it does help some, knowing that at least one of us is happy and carefree right now.

You smell like cocoa butter days after putting it on.

I used to associate the smell with unknown unattractive things in my mind but now I think of you.

Thanks for helping me reclaim a smell!

I honestly don't think I'm good enough for the career I want, the love I want, the friends I want, the life I want.

Incubus sings, "So would I be out of line, if I said, I miss you?"

I think the answer is yes. So I don't tell you how much I miss not being around you this summer.

I'm not sure which scares me more: the thought that you might not know I miss you...or the thought that you might not miss me.

I'm only happy when I'm eating.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/20/08

I have a friend who uses me whenever she needs something. I secretly hate her for it.

The fact that you confessed to having feelings for me despite knowing I'd never reciprocate pisses me off, and it won't bother me if it ruins our friendship.