Please propose while we're at the beach...

I know you have the ring. You know I'll say yes.

Please, please, please!

You really suck at relationships.

At least, you suck at them with me.

How strange it is that I have no wish to die; you could even call it a thirst for life; yet I have my suicide - from the note, to the books to my left and to my right, and the manner all planned out.

i really REALLY like him

BUT


i'm just so worried i'll mess it up. i'm willing to admit to myself that i'm afraid of being hurt, of even lettin anyone close enough to have the chance. why why why

Comment here to submit a secret 5/31/08

When I first started dating my boyfriend, he told me that it would take a long time for him to get to a place where he could have sex with me.

It's been almost six months, I'm very much in love with him, and I'm so glad that we haven't had sex yet. SO GLAD.

I'm waiting until my wedding night until I have sex but sometimes it's really really difficult. I've thought about masturbation but I'm pretty sure that being a Christian means that that's not an option either. I really really do want to do the Godly thing, but it's really getting difficult.

I haven't been depressed like this for two years. I don't know if I'm strong enough to get out again.

Sometimes you're so lethargic around me and other friends of ours that are girls, then you perk up immediately when the guys come around. It's annoying and obvious.

I just looked at pictures of us together from last year and fall semester....REALLY looked at them. And I could see the life and love in your eyes and mine. I realized I hadn't felt an inkling of that or seen you like that in such a long time.

I cried a little over you for the first time in many months. Fuck.

1. you know I love you.
2. you know that I miss you and that I want to see you.
3. you're only home for three more days.
4. our paths won't cross again until August, if then.
5. call me, stupid.

thanks for inviting me, ass holes.

UNC's girls worry too much about being rail thin. I dont know about any of you, but I love a well done muffin top!

now that i think about it, i really did hate my roomate.

i lied to my parents about making deans list again.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/30/08

I worry that when I tell people now that I'm anorexic (I was nearly hospitalized when I was in middle school), they see my more-than-generous current body and don't believe me. I also worry that when I try to be encouraging to people who are struggling with the disease by sharing my success story, they look at me as their worst nightmare.

I just had sex in the back seat of my car. I feel dirty but OH SO fantastic!

why are there so many people with unrequited love on this site? and why aren't they about me?

I think I'm developing an eating disorder. The last several months have been really tough for me emotionally, and I can't eat when I'm upset. Now, I feel like I can't eat anyway, even though things are getting better in my personal life. I feel like if I know I should be eating more, I should be able just to eat more. The solution seems simple....so why can't I just make myself eat?

even though you did it in the most cowardly way, thank you for realizing what i should have realized. i just wish it wasn't awkward now.

I give up. I'm going to take the easy way out and just be a hardened jerk.

I give up. I'm going to take the easy way out and just be a hardened jerk.

Ever since I moved out of my place in Chapel Hill, I've lost all motivation to do anything. I'm starting this "great new chapter of my life" but all I want to do is stay in bed. I have a great new job and life ahead of me, so why am I so depressed?

Comment here to submit a secret 5/29/08

Whenever you slapped my face, it hurt. But when you slapped my face, it didn't sting, so it never hurt enough to count.
I've told no one, and I'm still not sure that I have anything to tell.
They were always "accidents." Too drunk, too strong, too careless. I'm just making a big deal of nothing...right?

I'm not calling you anymore. You can call me for once.

All you have to do is smile at me, and I forget all the reasons I'm supposed to stay away from you.


I hate myself for loving you, and even more for not having the strength to walk away.

I met someone and I'm falling way too fast. I know I should rear back but I don't want to and I'm not sure I can.

Heartbreak, here I come.

I wish my boyfriend didn't smoke pot.

even though you think you got away with lying to me, a few weeks after it happened, I still know that you lied. I've known since the day the lie took place, and you still lie about it to this day...
i don't know if i can really enjoy being with you until you tell me...

Recovering from anorexia is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I need a hug.

My friend always joked that I had a crush on you. I didn't, atleast not like that. But that day we talked forever by the pit...and you told me how pretty you thought my eyes were-it hit me that I definitely like you. But we are both in serious relationships...and both very much in love with our respective partners, so I will try my best not to think about you this summer, because I'm sure you won't be thinking of me.

I slept with a guy I met only a few days ago...and I feel like I've known him for years, and I think I'm falling in love with him already. I don't want this to happen so fast, I want to be cautious...but when he cuddles me, it feels so amazing, and that feeling is what gets me through the day. I don't wnat to fall so hard so fast because I know I'll only get hurt, but at the same time, it seems like he's falling just as hard for me too, or am I imagining it. That's what is racking my brain and preventing me from sleeping. I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone, and I've only known you for a few days. I hope you feel the same, because I couldn't survive one more heartbreak right now.

I'm really mad at you for making me feel so trapped, and for still making me feel that way even though we're not together anymore.

I'm trying. I promise, I really am.

I don't want to go back to Chapel Hill next year. I'd rather just leave on a good note so my friends don't figure out how awful I am.

I orgasmed for the first time yesterday via masturbation after trying to do so for several years...

I wasn't thinking of you.

i still have my vcard--you would never guess it--but i think it's because i feel as if i dont know HOW to do the physical stuff...am i the only one who feels like this??

sometimes i wish that i had scars from it
so that everyone forever could see what you did to me

but mostly i still love you and want you (the real you, the you you were before) back

I was disappointed when I came to college and there was no telekinesis club.

I'm a guy, an I pee sitting down at home. Seriously, you dont have to turn on the light, you never have to wonder if the seat is up or down, and there is no chance of splatter.

I've recently realized that I get very nervous every time someone brings up Jews, Judaism, Israel, or anything having to do with me being a Jew. I've been raised a Jew, but I'm beginning to think that I want nothing to do with it anymore.

But if that IS true, and I start exploring other faiths, my family would be so disappointed in me...

I don't ask about your dates because I care. I ask because I'm a glutton for punishment and want to be reassured that I have a chance.

It's only been a few weeks since I've graduated from UNC and I miss it so much already! UNC was my dream school and I had an amazing time there! I guess I am just afraid that I will never have as good of a time in life as I did during these "care free" college days of mine. Everyone keeps saying that college is the best 4 years of your life. This makes me sad and nervous because it makes it seem like everything in my life is going downhill and that I'll never relive these amazing moments again.

It's so hard to believe you when you say "don't worry about it" anymore...

Last time you lied. I just want to help.

I love that my best friend's ex-girlfriend is insanely jealous of me just from looking at pictures on Facebook. I love it even more that we've hooked up twice and she has no idea.

I was told by a friend when I was young that it's good luck to eat your own scabs.
It's never seemed to bring any luck... and yet, over ten years later, I'm still doing it...

I have a totally sweet, stable, kinda nerdy boy that is totally into me and I sort of like him back after knowing him for a few years. However, the guy I really want is the witty, rude, and antagonistic hottie I met last weekend.

Sigh.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/28/08

Comment here to submit a secret 5/26/2008

Comment here to submit a secret 5/25/2008

I wish you'd call me out when I'm a jerk to you. You think that you deserve to be treated rudely by me because you hurt me, but it's not true. You deserve better. But if you don't think so, why should I?

My roomates for next year are already fucking takin advantage of me. I'm seriously on the brink of just living by myself. But I know I'll just wuss out and, once again, give in to everyone else's demands.

It was a completely normal night; I was studying. I was in a good place. And then suddenly, out of nowhere, a memory surfaces of going with you to a sketchy pizza place with our best friend and the fun we had.

Good God, why? I wasn't even feeling hungry, much less for pizza.

I've graduated and don't start my "real job" for another few months. This in between phase sucks, I just want to go ahead and START my new life.

I love Naruto. LOVE it.

Sometimes I wonder if people see through me and realize how unintelligent I actually am.

I'm not coming back in the Fall and I still haven't told my parents. I think they will kill me, but I just can't sit there in school and pretend it's right for me anymore....

I haven't slept in 4 days since I stopped taking Lorcet. I've been throwing up a lot and I tihink my parents know whats going on.

I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else.

I am in Chapel Hill, with all of these people around me. It is Memorial Day Weekend, so I should have tons of stuff to do, but I have nothing to do. It kind of sucks.

I'm getting sick of waiting for you to call.

So, instead of letting you stew over how to "let me down easy," I'm going to help you:

You didn't mean as much as you thought. Goodbye.

I don't care about:
-My grades
-My future
-How much money I'm going to owe after I leave this place.
I could graduate with a 2.4 and become nothing more than a housewife and be fine with that. I came here almost exclusively for basketball, I've somehow gotten into every game thus far (Dook included), and I know I made the right choice. But every day that goes by without Danny and Wayne and Ty un-declaring from the draft, I start to panic a little more...

Im taking it as a sign that after this fight our favorite show is on a marathon. Hope we have a marathon too.

we had sex again this morning, and i still can't make myself feel bad about it.

it feels right, and i'm sorry.

i honestly did want to get back together, but then i realized what a dick you are.

thank god it didn't take me all summer to get over you...

i dont think you realized how hurt/angry i was last night. sometimes i feel that because you are such a nice guy that i can not get angry at you, because you never intentionally do things to hurt my feelings. but my gosh, if you had called me last night, i might have exploded over the phone. you have no idea.

I really, really want to make out with someone. I'm starting to have random feelings for my guy friends that I know wouldn't be there if I wasn't so deprived.

I really miss you. More than you probably know. And Im glad I got to speak to you and embrace you before I left for the summer. I was stupid enough to walk away without getting your number. And someting makes me think that you wanted me to have it.

If someone gave me the chance to live forever, I would do it. I don't think I'd be lonely. I'm lonely now, and at least if I lived forever I'd never stop learning and seeing new things.

I think I'm getting addicted to the valium I'm prescribed, but then again I think I may be using it appropriately and just wasn't before. Its really hard to trust myself sometimes.

I'm at a university and am surrounded by intelligent, attractive girls. The m/f ratio is even in my favor. So why do I ignore them and keep trying to date girls I used to go to high school with?

I can't decide whether I'm too good, or not good enough...

We've been together for a few months now, but I'm afraid that you won't ever really love me.

I'm in love with you.

I'm afraid to say it first.

I intentionally hit on cocky guys, let them buy me drinks and even get my number. then I don't return their calls. I know it's mean, but being a former "ugly girl" I get such a rush from being able to take them down a few pegs.

I'm addicted to prolific. the pathetic part is I'm not even good at it, but I can't stop playing.

I love your eyes and your laugh and your everything. I love how comfortable we are with each other. I know that we are far from perfect together, but if anything happened to you, I would die. I love you so much-- how could I have been blind for so long? And why do I still think about him?

You messed up our perfect goodbye when you forgot to confess that you love me. I'm going to find someone new while I'm away and I hope I can forget what I thought we had.

How do you get over a 3 yr relationship? He is the love of my life and I thought he was the one...

I work for the computer labs on campus, and I really hate you assholes.

if it weren't for the pain i know i would inflict on my parents and friends... i would kill myself.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/23/08

my goal for the summer is to not fall for me.


wish me luck.

I know you hate those pictures of yourself from a few years ago because you were a little heavier.

I'm not looking at that, though. It's the same smile, and the same gorgeous eyes.

So no, I don't tell a difference.

And no, I don't think you're fat.

i'm scared that i don't love you anymore, but you're being such a dick right now that i just can't make myself give a shit.

i'm sorry that i'm cheating on you.

i missed him.

Your choice to not talk to me this summer gives me the chance to get closer to him without being afraid...and ruins your chance of anything. Sorry.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/22/08

At one point, you were my best friend. I know that we've grown apart, and I accept that. I really do. I still love you as deeply as i did before.

I wish you'd talk to me, though. I know you're in pain and I want to help. Just to listen.

Can we please become part of each others lives again? I miss you.

I listen to mugglecast. I don't know why that's so embarassing, but I go to lengths to make sure that no one knows!

I despise people who talk in "abrevs"

Even though he isn't my boyfriend (yet), I already fucking hate the girl who flirts with him constantly via his facebook wall. Get a life!

I don't hate your girlfriend. I just hate the fact that she's living the life that I was supposed to have with you. Have a great romantic-getaway at the beach this weekend. I secretly hope that you get in a wreck and that she doesn't live through it. but then karma would probably not be on my side.

I hope I have sex with so many girls this summer, or at least one, so that you won't still be my last after all these months.

i skip samson every time now.

My ex and I learned together that he likes to spank his partners/I like to get spanked. But now, I would have no idea how I would ever ask someone new to do those things to me, even though I want it so much.

I know I said I wouldn't take sides, but really? He's right. You're being a bitch.

When we both agreed it wouldn't mean anything, I desperately wanted it to mean everything to you.

I finally realized you were the one for me and everything was perfect… only a few months later you passed away unexpectedly… now I am alone to pick up the pieces… and I am afraid I won’t ever be able to move on because I will always compare others to you

I want to be a whore, and sleep with as many guys and girls as possible.

I'm just a sexual guy...

Every time we're on the phone and I tell you that I'm reading this site, it's because I've posted a secret that I don't have the nerve to say to you, and I keep hoping you'll check it out and wonder if that one is from me.

Care more.

I'm not anti-social... I'm just sick of you!

i wish i could even remotely relate to any of the posts about broken hearts and love. i want to be broken hearted!! they really are right about better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all :(

i's the basic "girl is in love with her really good guy friend scenario." i've known him since highschool, and he liked me freshman year, but it just didn't work out. we've been friends ever since. and it's not even about looks for me, he just has one of the most amazing personalities ever. and he is so driven that he inspires me to do things i never in a million years EVER thought i could do. but there's a problem: i'm pretty sure he doesn't see me the same way. and i hate it.

I don't know if I can make it through the summer without kissing a guy who liked my friend before school was over.

I'd never commit suicide, but sometimes I wonder if it'd be worth it just to make my family like me again.

Life is so complicated. And I have no answers - not one. No matter how earnestly I try to sort the world around me. No matter how much I try to make sense of the past nor how much I try to understand myself, or what's "right." Not only virtue of character, but virtue of thought.

It's so overwhelming. What I would give for the certainty and conviction of youth mixed with the experience and wisdom of age.

Does "just good friends" mean I'm way too ugly for him? Honestly? Because, that's what I say when I don't find them attractive...

Working 40 hour weeks this summer at my internship has made me kind of depressed about what the rest of my life's going to be like after I graduate.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/21/08

just because i have unrequited feelings for you doesn't mean i'm an idiot. quit looking at me like i'm going to pounce on you like a drooling puppy. geez.

I can feel myself being a huge unreasonable bitch to you all the time and still can't stop. But you always let me get away with it, so I have a hard time even feeling bad.

I feel completely alone and terrified. And I want to tell you and I want you to hold me and I know I can't because I love you too much. I can't help but want to protect you from how bad this feels. I guess it does help some, knowing that at least one of us is happy and carefree right now.

You smell like cocoa butter days after putting it on.

I used to associate the smell with unknown unattractive things in my mind but now I think of you.

Thanks for helping me reclaim a smell!

I honestly don't think I'm good enough for the career I want, the love I want, the friends I want, the life I want.

Incubus sings, "So would I be out of line, if I said, I miss you?"

I think the answer is yes. So I don't tell you how much I miss not being around you this summer.

I'm not sure which scares me more: the thought that you might not know I miss you...or the thought that you might not miss me.

I'm only happy when I'm eating.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/20/08

I have a friend who uses me whenever she needs something. I secretly hate her for it.

The fact that you confessed to having feelings for me despite knowing I'd never reciprocate pisses me off, and it won't bother me if it ruins our friendship.

My boyfriend is the only guy that's ever given me an orgasm. I've hooked up with plenty of other guys and it's always been unsatisfying, uncomfortable, or even painful. Does this mean he's the one?

I can't wait for college to be over so I can apply to grad school and start over in another new place. I love my friends and UNC, I just can't slow down and I don't know why.

This time, I'm in love with you.

But I've gotten so far with my current boyfriend, and I don't have the time or patience for another "project."

I'm sorry for thinking of you like that, but you're so far away and if you can't understand that I need you to need ME sometimes, then I don't know what else to do but shut you out of my life before I'm in too deep.

Yes, I'm talking to you again, but I'm never going to take you back. Quit trying to woo me.

having a roommate that's engaged kind of sucks.

I either need more from you, or for you to just leave me alone. Being in the middle is wearing me down.

Having to see you everyday doesn't bother me at all, it just reminds me of how lucky I am that we're not together anymore.

I am the best motivational speaker, because I know all the things I wish I could hear but nobody tells me.

I miss your dog more than I miss you.

I kissed a guy for the first time Friday night. I was just standing there when he came up and kissed me. It was my first same-sex kissed and I liked it.

It was only a friend and I don't think he thinks anything about it. But that's all I can think about. I want more.

I feel dirty.

i just had the greatest sex i've ever had with the love of my life.

i keep trying to make myself feel sorry, because it wasn't with my boyfriend. but i can't.

I hope with every fiber of my being that you never make it into med school and that you never become a doctor. If you didn't care about someone you said you loved, how could you possibly care for a stranger? You just want the money, car, house and prestige. Me on the other hand? I will work hard towards something I am passionate about... in the end, you won't have the life, and I WILL.

If you let me down this time, I swear, I'm done with you.

I wish I had a best friend

The last time I really talked to you was on the phone right here under this tree in this daily picture. Afterward I lay face down in the grass exactly in the center of this picture and cried while people walked by. I wonder if my tears even slightly helped it bloom so beautifully...

I pity you, for making fun of me and not taking an interest in me because I am heavier than most girls.

You missed out on the best thing in your life.

As cliche as it sounds, big girls need love, we have a lot of love to give.

Before I went to Carolina, Alumni told me that I would fall in love with the place and be so sad to leave it. I feel ashamed that I was so happy to graduate because I didn't have to come back to Carolina... i feel like it makes em a bad Alum.

To my old roommate: You're a horrible roommate and person. You are not attractive, and every girl you meet does not want to bang you. I'm glad I don't have to deal with your superiority complex anymore.

To my future roommate: You're amazing. You're the sister I never had. I really do love you, and you know it.

I'm developing a big crush on my new house-mate. I am kind of hoping that the summer apart from her boyfriend breaks them up. Until then, or in lieu of that, I'll just enjoy the cute girl who lives below me. I just wish she didn't seem so perfect for me.

I wish you weren't studying abroad. I'm sorry to be selfish, but I'll miss you too much.

I hate the memory of old. I'm getting better at dealing with the fact that we've split up - and it actually helps to think of the you of now rather than the you of old when it hurts inside.

Memories though of happier times; and telling each other that we would never leave one another - what weight do words of love to our future lovers now hold?

It's still incomprehensible to me to think that you can fall out of love after feeling something that felt so permanent. And yet it's happened to me. Twice.

I think I've done something really bad... you'd laugh if you heard it, but it's tearing me apart.

I feel cruel for hoping that I am unwittingly somebody's "one that got away". not because I want to feel desirable, but because it would mean at least one other person would feel this unrequited and terrible.

I am really good friends with my boyfriend's best friend and the three of us have a very close relationship. We all hang out a lot and joke about threesomes and me having sex with his best friend.

The thing is, I'm not so sure his best friend is joking about wanting to have sex with me.

I don't know why I always date assholes when you are the guy I should want to be with. You say and do all the right things, you are always there for me. I wish I could make myself fall in love with you.

I have a crush on you and I don't even really know you. The couple of times we've met and spoke, I've been in awe. There is just this intellectual vibe coming from you that's absolutely irresistible. I would love to get to know you better but it's now summer and I'm going abroad in the fall.

I'm supposed to be saving up my money from graduation gifts for rent money but I splurged on a $200 dress.

I deserve it.

my house keeper is SO loud and wakes me up every morning. I'm just too scared to say anything.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/19/08

i woke up in time to go to an exam for a class i knew i was going to fail anyway ..

and rolled over and went back to sleep

but it doesn't matter now!

I feel guilty letting anyone else use my laptop when I know how much I've masturbated while using it!

I posted this secret in april...

"it took a year and a half, but i think I'm finally over him! But i'm afraid that all the feelings i've worked hard to get rid of will come back when i see him this summer...

Posted by E at 10:28 PM 1 comments"

And now I'm falling head over heels again. Why is it so hard for me to stay away from him??? I'm frustrated but also shamefully happy

I'm beginning to think that my best friend and best guy friend have had something going on that I don't know about. It feels like I got a door slammed in my face.

I'm dying to make out with my best guy friend. Not because I'm attracted to him, but because all my other girl friends have...is he really that good??

When I came to Carolina 2 years ago I cut almost all my ties to friends and acquaintances from high school. I never regret that decision until I'm home for the summer and have no one...

You make it impossible for me to hate you. Even when you say something absolutely idiotic, I love you more.

I can't stand that you're not with me.

i am still miserably in love with you.

and i know i shouldn't have told you, but it still killed me that you didn't say "i love you too".

I tell you that I hate you for hurting me because you didn't want to try again this summer. And I do hate you for it. But I don't know if I want you back because I actually still love you, or just because I want a boyfriend again, or even just because I wasn't the one that dumped you.
I hate that I want a boyfriend so badly and I hate that I'll never find anyone I'll feel as comfortable with as I did with you. But no, I really don't want you back because you were the worst boyfriend in the world, you never did a thing for me except made me think that love could still be love, even when it was so one-sided

Comment here to submit a secret 5/18/08

I wish they made an 'I'm sorry I screwed your boyfriend' card. Even though you broke up, I'm still messing around with him, and I just can't find a way to tell you. So here goes:

You're my best friend. I'm so sorry.

i say that i trust you, but i don't really mean it.
i just don't want to be THAT person that demands you not do the things you want.


but, i think the only reason i don't trust you is that i can't trust myself.

I'm absolutely in love with the campus squirrels. I find them fascinating.

im really scared about having a handicapped child one day , either mentally or physically. i want so badly to have a perfect kid. i dont think i could handle it if it wasn't!

Among the many reasons that we could never be just friends, one of them is that if you stay with the guy you're with now, I could never respect you again. Being attracted to him makes makes me seriously question your taste and thus myself.

when I was young and first discovered AOL an older man/stranger IMed me. he started talking about sexual things i didn't understand.
he told me to see if i saw a whitish bump above my vagina which would be my "clitoris". i found it and thought it was bad, like it was a zit or something. i kept trying to get rid of it, take it off.
my obgyn has never mentioned anything being off, but i'm constantly afraid there's something wrong with it becuase of this, and that maybe that's why i've never figured out how to masturbate successfully.

I have no idea what to do with my pubic hair. I'm afraid of grossing a guy out.

We broke off contact for the last time; I still loved you, you didn't love me. And I'm generally ok now - I've accepted it, even though I haven't been able to move on.

But damn it, when I see a picture of you, my whole world comes crashing down. Especially at night because I don't want to be THAT person - waking up my friends at 3am and being a bother because I need help.

I confessed to one my secrets yesterday. I feel fearless, and so much more comfortable in my own skin.

I love acting and saying things that are sexy. But when it comes to actually having sex with the guys I've egged on, I'm scared out of my mind. I love teasing and that's it... for now at least.

I'm 21 years old and just graduated college, but I LOVE the movie high school musical.

I remembered today that years ago when I was little, my parents thought I was allergic to broccoli for some reason. I hated broccoli, so I just played along, even though I'd eaten it at friends houses all the time and never had an allergic reaction. I'd forgotten that I'm not actually allergic because I've lied for so many years just to avoid having to eat it.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/17/08

Instead of getting into a fight and telling you exactly how much you hurt me, I decided to let you go. I can't hold on anymore.

As much as it hurts, I know I made the right decision.

I stayed online for hours hoping that you will message me, but you never do. I check my phone all the time hoping that I have a text from you, but I never do. I try so hard to convince myself that I'm fine with us just being friends, but I don't know how to change the way I feel toward you. I wish you missed me the same way that I miss you.

I really think we're meant to be together. I think you know it too. Why are you so scared?

I've dreamed about you the last few nights in a row. I know they don't mean anything, but I'm amused and saddened that even in my dreams my feelings for you are so clearly unrequited (and that feelings I thought I'd kicked to the curb are rearing their ugly heads again).

We broke up over a year ago. We've each dated other people since then. Yet you still keep hoping we'll somehow end back up together. Why can't you understand that until you get past the idea of "us", we won't even be able to be friends?

when i found out you died this morning in a car wreck i went into shock. I've been reading all of our old and recent messages to each other online and I don't think it's completely sunk in that you're gone...

that the next time I message you online you won't ever be there to respond again.

I hope where you are there's a beautiful beach and a big, friendly dog you can call your own....I know you'll want to be there forever. I do hope wherever you are you're happy....I miss you and love you, buddy....thank you for making me see that the moon is really so beautiful....

I wish you understood that when we hang out what I ACTUALLY want is for you to just cuddle with me. Because I think you would if you figured it out.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/16/08

you keep promising we'll hang out and it never happens. I only have a few weeks left here, why do I keep believing you??

I honestly think I'm fat.

I've wished so many times that I had the self-discipline to be anorexic. How do they do it??

I told myself I wasn't going to let my happiness depend on a guy anymore. But I get sad if a day goes by and I don't get to talk to you.

when my roomate isnt here i am naked all the time in our apt...it's just so liberating

I think I like the you I talk to on AIM better than the in-person you. It's always such a let-down when we hang out.

I think that I am more afraid to be vulnerable than I am of being alone--but just barely.

you keep surprising me with the new levels you sink to.

Once, I slept with three guys in the same month. No one would ever believe that I would do something like this. For the first time in my life, I have a secret that I can't admit to ANYONE and it makes me feel alone.

i've been sure of my major and career plans since high school, but today i decided i wanted to change. but now its too late.

I really do love both of you. It sucks.

I love our late night conversations, and how you make me laugh, and everything else that you're so good at that he stopped doing years ago.

...But the next day, I always end up having sex with him.

i let my weight dictate my happiness.

I think we're meant to be together. I think you know it too. Why can't we just admit it?

Your dad sent me a picture of you today. I hadn't seen an updated picture of you in over 6 months. Even though we broke up almost 2 years ago I still remembered the exact curve of your lips and the way your eyes crinkle up in the corners, and how your hair falls into your eyes.

I'm in love with him. I wouldn't be with him if I weren't. But why did I suddenly miss you so badly when I saw that picture?

i just cut myself for the first time in 2 years...i thought i'd finished with that.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/15/08

It's not that I don't want to hang out with you. It's just that if we go to that place, we'll probably run into your girlfriend. Then I'll remember why you and I aren't that close in the first place.


(You didn't want me. I still think about it every day.)

I used to not remember my dreams. It was funny how I'd wake up and have no recollection of anything.

But these past few months I have... and I hardly ever have happy dreams. I didn't think it was possible to wake up with such negative and crappy feelings every day.

I don't understand why. I'm a happy person. Why can't I just dream happy? It's really starting to get to me.

i wanted you to spend your last night in chapel hill with me. I guess you had better people to spend it with.

Please don't come visit if you're having sex with someone else. I know you like me, why are you so afraid of only being with one person?

since i met him, i have cheated on every boyfriend i've ever had with him.
but, it feels more like i'm cheating on him with every boyfriend i've ever had.

i love you more than anyone, but i won't tell you.

i'm scared i will never learn how to be faithful.

I graduated three days ago, and it already depresses me that I can no longer watch TV, hang out with, or talk frequently with my roommate. Having to move and grow up really sucks at this moment.

Mainly, I just miss my friend.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/14/08

I am sleeping with someone you know well. You know we are doing it, just admit it to yourself and let me leave you.

It's just so screwed up that I think you'll be proposing soon.

I'm going to say no, it's just not fair to you.

I keep getting uglier as I get older.

I can't stop thinking about last night. But I don't think it meant anything to you.

Every time I read a secret about someone being secretly in love with a good friend, I pretend its you.

But I'm pretty sure you have no idea this website exists.

I wish you would get over me and just leave me behind... its makes me sad that you are feeling so upset about us breaking up. i kind of want to get back with you so you wont feel so bad, but that would be out of pity and you wouldn't want that... would you?

1 year at UNC showed me that not everyone is in it for themselves.

Thanks.

Two years ago, a girl accused me of getting her pregnant. Not knowing what to do, and respecting her decision to keep the child, I asked her to marry me.

It turned out that she wasn't pregnant, and never had been.

So when you wonder why I'm distant and fear commitment, it's because the biggest commitment of my life was based upon a lie.

I'm afraid that without even thinking about it I just ruined the best thing that ever happened to me.

You only like me when you have exhausted the search to find a reason not to.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/13/08

what was that casual goodbye? i thought we were better friends than that, and it's not like we'll be seeing each other again anytime soon

Last year, I had everything one needs to be truly happy - then I took on an internship over the summer, ended up by myself with no friends or companions (not for lack of trying), and spent every day in isolation.

It showed me that the mental strength I thought I had was a farce, and the resulting depression from acute loneliness fundamentally changed me as a person.

Then this year happened, and I lost it all - love, friendship, and everything that I thought defined me as a good person.

And so I sit on my bed, at home this summer. But life is cruel - though I'm now at the place I would've given my all to be last summer, I'm lonelier and more in need of a hug and a reassurance from a friend than I ever have been.

And I have no one here.

I feel like my roommate always hates me. I wish I could fix it.

I only ever really liked maybe one of your friends that wasn't my friend first. All of your friends are either REALLY weird, completely self-centered and/or fucking psychotic. I want to go up to every one of your shitty friends and tell them how shitty they are. That would feel fantastic.

I'm starting to forget what your kiss feels like, and the shape of your hand. I miss everything about you, gave you everything i had. You took everything from me, and now, my memories, which once kept me company,are starting to fade...

Part of me is still in love with my ex-boyfriend from years ago. Most of me is in love with my current boyfriend. Why, no matter how hard I try or no matter the length of time separating our relationship, does that part of me still exist?

No one understands why I still love him. He knows me better than anyone. But why can't I forget him? Why can I still feel his lips on mine? Why do I still, on sleepless nights such as these, finally find peace imagining his arms around me? Why can't I be satisfied?

I love my boyfriend. I do. How do I stop these thoughts? I don't know how much longer I can take it. This part of my heart, although relatively small, dominates my thoughts. But, why?

I really want to hook up with a guy before I graduate, but I'm not gay. Girls have it so easy.

don't leave.

I know we were just having causal sex at the end of the semester, but now that I'm home I can't stop thinking about it and how I hope that you don't move on to someone else this summer because I want it so badly when I come back

I had a ridiculous crush on one of my professors all year. It helped to distract me from things going on around me that I didn't want to deal with. But I want a real relationship and am afraid that I don't know how to be in one because all my greatest love affairs have been in my head.

i realized today, as I hugged you and said goodbye, that I'm in love with you. I would give anything for this year not to be over so I would have a chance to tell you that, and so I would still at least have my friend.

I don't want to be a senior. I am absolutely terrified of graduating and leaving behind all of the amazing people that I have met over the last three years.

One of your best friends is in love with you... and I can't tell you, or anyone.

I really wished this was you:

"I'm in love with you. And before I get my diploma, I'm going to tell you."

But you got your diploma yesterday.

seeing you tonight makes me realize what a big mistake it has been for me to not act upon my feelings. I'm full of regret for not ever telling you how i feel

The real reason is because you're inconsiderate, presumptuous, pushy, and honestly, a bitch.


I only wish I could've told it to your face and made you realize: it's your own fault that it didn't happen and even though you think I'm the bad guy and try to make me feel that way, you did it to yourself.

I graduated today. And I can't help feel sad. I never had the guts to tell the guy that I've liked for the past 2 years, how much I love him.And now it's too late. How do you know if a guys likes or even loves you back? It's so hard. One day I am hopeful and the next I am not hopeful. I am so scared of rejection that I fear that I'll let go of all the people I may think I am in "love" with in my life eventually. And that I will end up all alone.

after you broke up with me, i hooked up with a random guy just to prove that guys still found me attractive. now i miss you more than ever. please come back to me...

I'm so disappointed. I expected so much more. When you ask what's wrong, I don't know how to tell you that because we both know you're not going to change.

Thank God for the summer being here and soon I won't have to talk to you much at all anymore. Because fuck this. You don't give a shit that you play games with me and I'm just feeding your fucking ego by doing this. Things aren't going to change in the fall either. Fuck that and fuck you.

I hate my vagina.

I don't know if I'm actually chubby or if I just have skewed body image.

i love you, i've loved you for years. now that you finally need me, i think i love him.

I don't really feel that bad for you. It's your own fault, and you got what you deserved. Besides, I tried to help you, and if you'd let me this wouldn't have happened.

after you told me you were gay, i took a shit in your yard... twice.

I'm going to really miss you.

I'm so scared you won't miss me the way I miss you.

I didn't really LOVE college. I don't know why! I feel like a freak, and it looks like everyone else loved it. I had friends, did really well in my classes, did a ton of activities. Carolina was great, the best university ever. But I'm sort of indifferent about leaving it all. Maybe in a few months it will really hit me?

I like coming home only for the chances of finding the perfect country boy and marrying a farmer.

I'm afraid being home will make me an angry person like I was before I came to UNC. I've moved on from everything that happened here but there's always a chance.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/11/08

I want to switch my major to physics and build a fucking time machine. Not because I need one, but only because I know that I could do it.

I want to tell him how much his mom pisses me off sometimes.

I'm not going to, but I'm afraid it's going to slip. She's just so damn annoying.

I have a large penis, and want to have sex with girls, but im way too shy.

The best thing about being home is being able to take my laptop into the bathroom with me.

I just had an incredible orgasm. In my car. Driving down 15-501.

We've been friends for a long time. I give you advice about girls and life. Now I'm falling in love with you. Crap.

I already know that I am going to break your heart this summer.

I know that I have to lose one of you. But I love him more.

I'm so sorry.

i didn't study. i was too busy having good-bye sex.

I no longer know how I feel about you.

Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed, I think of how great you feel against me and wish I could spend every night wrapped up in you.

Sometimes, when I'm hanging out with my friends, I can't wait for you to graduate so that I don't have to think about you as much.

You probably resent me right now and think I'm really happy about this. I thought I'd be happy...but I'm not. I don't know what to think or feel...other than knowing I don't like seeing you hurt.

The only real friend I've ever had just left, and I don't think he even knows how much he means to me. I'm so afraid of next year. What if I don't find another friend?

I don't even know how to act around you or her anymore.

I no longer know how I feel about you.

Sometimes, when I'm lying in bed, I think of how great you feel against me and wish I could spend every night wrapped up in you.

Sometimes, when I'm hanging out with my friends, I can't wait for you to graduate so that I don't have to think about you as much.

The only real friend I've ever had just left, and I don't think he even knows how much he means to me. I'm so afraid of next year. What if I don't find another friend?

Comment here to submit a secret 5/10/08

you make me feel like shit ---> i get sad ---> i cut ---> you get angry at me for cutting ---> you make me feel like shit ---> ∞


i know it's going to happen again.

i am terrified of her.
because of you.

I'm black and I really want get at a white girl. I just don't know if there are any that are down for it.

I'm finally happy.

though he claims i'm the only one, i'm scared to death that he will find someone better in the big city he lives in when i'm not there to remind him.

I wanted to be your motivation. Obviously I wasn't good enough.

when my parents told me they were having marriage problems, the only person i wanted to talk to was you..

that scares me more than a little bit

To my friends, I appear to be a pretty normal guy- I get good grades, party a lot, have decent success with girls, but what they don't know is that I love Japanese anime. I'm currently watching four or five series. I would never tell them, because I'm afraid of what they would think.

i do cocaine and none of my friends know. and i like it.

In a few months, I may be engaged. I'm too young and too single right now to tell anyone.

I won't know until this weekend if I'm pregnant or not, and you're out with your girlfriend worry free.

I hate this.

I'm in love with you. And before I get my diploma, I'm going to tell you.

i have two separate underwear drawers. i pull from one to be comfy, and i pull from the other if i think there is a chance they may be seen by someone else.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/9/08

I think I'm starting to trust you again.


Please don't hurt me again.


Though what's the phrase?

"Fool me twice, shame on me."

i want to be the girl who gives him an excuse to change

i miss you so much already. i think i have to NOT think about you for most of the summer, in order to keep my sanity.

we talked nonstop for 3 months, you hung out with my family over christmas break... and now? you wave to me when you drive by. you honestly can't be THAT busy.

I check this site just as much as I check facebook.

I hope this gets updated during the summer because I love to read this while I'm in the office!

When people are moving out, with all their stuff in their cars, I HATE it when they say, "I've got my life in here!" Your life is not made of your material possessions!!

My closest friends are graduating. I can't even fathom what my life will be like without them. I'm terrified of what is going to happen after the 11th of May.

How come I have "so many friends" yet I feel so left out of everyone's plans?

You think I got mad just because you were being a drunken idiot. I got mad because I finally told you I loved you and you said "Thanks." Even though you don't remember it I wish I had never said it.

I think I'm a better environmentalist than all of you. And I'm not even a hippy, an activist, a vegetarian, or any of the numerous other things you pretend to be to seem cool and eco-friendly

I don't know why, but I keep on believing you. I'm an idiot.

The sooner I graduate, the better.

I wish I had more friends who live close to me. It's always depressing going home 'cause most of my friends live out of state.

I also wish I hadn't alienated all the kids from my High School, maybe then I'd have friends at home.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/7/08

I was afraid once that when you graduated you and I might stop being friends. It never occurred to me that we might stop being friends before that.

I still don't understand why you pushed me away, or what you see as so much better than me in the one person you do trust.

I always act really chipper when pepole ask me my summer plans, but here I'm dreading it- I have a feeling this summer is going to be terrible, and I'm hoping August will get quickly so I can start fresh. I miss Carolina so much already and I haven't even left yet.

smoking disgusts me ... except when you do it, i find it really sexy

i think my laziness has reached a whole new level.

instead of walking to the window to check out the weather, i went to weather.com


my friends always nag on me and poke fun of how lazy i am, but i dont think anyone even realizes the extent to which it goes. i'm worried about how, in a couple of years, this could really hurt me in trying to find a job and everything.

I see you and I can't help but love it. But in the morning, just like every other morning, you still have a boyfriend. Is it bad that I'm kind of hoping Summer ruins your relationship? Yea, it's selfish I know.

I have never fallen in love
I have never committed myself to one person
Sometimes I make excuses for being with so many guys
Really I just want to prove to myself that people could want me
But I wish it was for more than just one night

sorority girls scare the hell out of me

i want nothing more than to throw this stupid ibm POS off of the tallest building when i graduate...and i'm only a junior.

When you get back to America, I want to be there at night on the tarmac to be the first person you see and kiss you before words are even exchanged.

It would be nice if fireworks and "Bittersweet Symphony" were involved in that moment, but not necessary.

I misspell stuff on purpose quite regularly... I don't know why

I cannot believe that you don't have the gumption to break up with me when you no longer care for me. I cannot be in a relationship with someone who won't even touch me. How about growing a pair and telling me how you really feel instead of making me be the only one in the relationship? I need intimacy...not sex, intimacy...from someone who's idea of romance is more than just the occasional head butt. You have a lot to learn. I didn't tell you this, because I don't have the courage. But you have hurt me excrutiatingly, and when I graduate Saturday, that will be the last time I think of you. You wasted eight months of college that I cannot get back, my senior year no less! Enjoy your last year at UNC without me. And next time, do not settle for someone you do not want just because it is easy. I beg you not to put another girl through this.

Last night I went over to my friend's dorm room and told him flat out that I like him. I totally got shot down, but I feel so empowered now that I have done what countless women only wish they could do.

She's immature, egotistical, pretentious, hypocritical, impatient, impetuous, needy, selfish, neurotic, paranoid, insane, overbearing, irrationally jealous, crass, materialistic, judgmental, hedonistic, reckless, irresponsible, myopic, haughty, unappreciative, lackluster in bed, and being with her has drained me to the point of hating Carolina. Yet, I am still in love with her. What is wrong with me?

I've NEVER wanted anything more than I want this. PLEASE! I don't deserve a lot of things that are just given to me but I do deserve this because I worked hard for it.

I hate that your job takes up so much of your life now.

I've had to give up a dream of mine (albeit a 'dorky' one) because now you're going to work instead of be with me.

I know you want to work, but I hate that it's become a larger part of your life than me.

You were right. That secret was about you. I know because I wrote it... but I don't think it's true anymore. Your window has closed. My apologies. I really was pulling for you...

I have extremely high hopes for this summer, in part because of how shitty things have been this year. If it doesn't turn things around for me then I don't know what I'll do.

Here's to the summer....don't let me down.

my boyfriend and i live far away but we're staying together this summer.

so far i dont miss him at ALL (its been a week). i feel relieved. i miss physical intimacy more than him. should i even be in this relationship?

Comment here to submit a secret 5/6/08

I'm the "other girl." And the bad thing is I really don't feel sorry for his girlfriend. I'm leaving in a few weeks and she gets to keep him.

It's just not fair.

I thought that things would be different in college, but another year has gone by and I am still in the friend zone. I'm 19 and have never been in a relationship.

I have been hopelessly crushing on my friend all year. He is a good religious kid and I party way too hard... I wish I could change my ways and be good enough for him. He would probably never think of me like that anyway.

I had only one real life partner. I had two affairs. But the closest kinds of "dating" relationships I've had were/are with people online who I meet on gaming sites and the like. I don't think I want it any other way, because I am too insecure with myself and too shy to have a physical partner; but the person I am dating now, across the net that is, I want nothing more than to be in his arms.

I got a B in Organic Chem and it feels as good as an A...I'm so happy right now!!!

My boyfriend has very different political views than I do. Now I'm starting to believe them, myself. I'm not sure if I believe them because I really do believe them, or if it's only because HE believes them. I don't want to change who I am just because of him... but I really do believe that he's right. And that's a little scary.

why did i ask the question if i didn't want to hear the answer?

I think taking adderall in order just to study is a form of cheating.

Though part of me really wants to try it. People seem to get so much better grades when they take it and study.

I proud that I've never used it, but I do still wonder quite frequently.

I don't like black people

I can't wait to leave so I don't have to see you every day and be reminded that nothing is the same, and now I have to like you in secret.

I'm really worried that I won't have this site to turn to every day this summer. I hope people keep posting their secrets. It's so hard waiting till Sunday for PostSecret.

You're sleeping on the couch right behind me and I'd like nothing more than to go cuddle with you. Too bad you had to go and get a new girlfriend.

i'm starting to doubt that i'll ever be more than "just a friend" to anyone.

Its weird, there is nothing that I am more afraid of than falling in love. But at the same time there is nothing that I want more in this world because I am starting to forget how good it feels.

I wish someone wanted me. It'd be nice for someone to care and want to figure me out.

I like picking zits.

Why is it when everyone else says they have zero motivation, they still get things done? When I have zero motivation, I stare at empty Word documents and fail classes.

I'm only with you to make my ex jealous, because he's unhappy with his current g/f, in the hopes that he'll realize what a good thing he lost and we'll get back together. Sorry.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/5/08

i cheated on you. three times. you still dont know. i am scared i probably will do it again... so thats why i broke up with you.

i know i just broke your heart... i am sorry. but i am afraid of the future... somehow i know that i will do you wrong in the end. so i had to end it now. sorry baby

i'm ready to get the fuck out of chapel hill. i don't care how many people love it, it is a BUBBLE! and franklin street is OLD!

i somehow let my last semester of college completely slip through my fingers. what do i do now?

I like my new guy so much, more than I ever thought I would!! But I really like a couple of his friends too...

I feel so close to all of you who read and respond to these secrets. I wish I knew you personally. I have no doubt that you are all amazing. Thank you.

I wasn't sure how I felt about you until you told me how you felt about her. Now I know exactly how I feel but I'm stuck in the friend zone forever.

I'm trying to set up a threesome with the two girls that I'm studying with. they are both really hot

I want to be excited about the future, but I just don't want to let go of the present. I think I'd much rather just keep the present.

i don't care that you cheated. i don't care that you hate me. i'd do anything to be with you again. you made me feel like me, and i haven't had that since.

I get sexually aroused by drastic makeovers.

At this point, I'm almost willing to give up my summer internship to stay here and be with you.

I have a boyfriend who treats me like a princess, but lately all I can think about is one of my best friends and if it would ever work out between us.

The reason I left your house so quickly that night was because I was afraid I was going to kiss you

Every time I eat at Lenoir I get diarrhea. This happens no where else.

i want to take your virginity, just not too fast. and it's not because i'm concerned for you, i'm concerned for me.

I said no. He didn't let that stop him.

I found the picture of us in my drawer as I was cleaning out my desk to move out, and I completely broke down. My roommate walked in and I busied myself with taking apart my storage cubes, but he knows. Everyone knows how broken my life is without you.

I wish, for once, you would choose us over your boyfriend. We try to brush it off, but it actually really hurts and angers us. And we don't want the gift of your time. We want time that you actually, truly, want to spend with us.

I just hope it works out. Because if it doesn't, you might actually realize the good friendships that you have lost.

I tell everybody I'm over you. I know you'll never see me in that way. I probably won't ever see you again. But every week I go look up your Facebook pictures and melt for a few minutes. You're just that hot.

i miss you so much it hurts. literally. i think about you all the time and think about the times we had together. but what hurts more than anything is that i know you never think about me.

My parents made me feel so guilty about choosing UNC that I can't even tell them that I have depression, I'm failing my classes, I lost all my friends, and I hate it here.

Everyone else says they have zero motivation because it's the end of senior year and yet they still get shit done. I'm embarrassed because for me, zero motivation really means that, and I'm really afraid I'm going to fail this last class I need to graduate.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/4/08

i'm sick of your lies, i'm sick of your bullshit and i'm sick of your drama. we were best friends at one point but after years of this, i'm done with it. you won't be able to tell because i'll keep in touch but...i've finally given up on you.

i started smoking weed last year in an attempt to stop getting mad at everyone else who treated it as the most important thing in the world. i figured if i did it, then i couldnt get mad at them for doing it. im not against smoking, i just hate that it has become so much of my friends passion/necessity. plus they act so different when they're high. i just figured if i was high too i would stop noticing. i didn't.

i call you and block my number all the time, just to hear your voice. i know it has been over 2 years since anything happened between us, but there is something about you. i so wish we could try it again.

Me and my friend yelled "hey baby" and "you could get it" to girls Thursday and Friday. If you smiled and/or waved back it was us. We hope we made your day better. Your sexy and you deserve it.

I haven't applied myself this year at all. I've slacked, and I've settled. My good is never good enough. I'm only a freshman, but I'm afraid I'll continue this downward spiral, this seemingly apathetic attidue, throughout my entire college career. I'm upset with my B's; they could've been A's if I would have put in the effort. I feel like I'm letting my parents down, and I'm letting myself down. I feel like such a liar when my parent's ask me if I've tried my hardest. I always say "Of course I did" but in reality, I could've tried way harder. Sometimes I despise myself for not working as hard as I could, and I don't really know what else to say or do.

I want a Jim so badly. I want to be someone's Pam. Where in the world are the Jims? Am I crazy and unrealistic for wanting that?

I just found out that you let another girl try to jack you off last night when you were drunk. I've been with you two years. When I asked if you still wanted to be with me, you said "yes." But when I asked if I should be with you, you said you "guessed not," and you were going to let me dump you then and there, without another word.

I wanted you to fight for me.
I wanted you to be faithful.

But you didn't do either. I'm still with you anyway --- right now I just don't know why. I think I'm just too scared I won't find anyone else.

Last weekend he fingered me and I gave him a blow job while my one of my roommates was asleep in the room. Later, when my other roommates came home, we lied and said all we did was make out and they believed us. I felt really bad about it and told myself I'd never hook up again while one of them was in the room.

I don't like my sorority.

the reason i've been getting snappy lately is her. i'll always get jealous when you tell me you're hanging out with her... i know it's irrational because we are so happy together but i can't get over it. i'm sorry... you deserve my complete trust.

When I am here in Chapel Hill I love it. But I always think about when I can go home next and how much I miss home. It a few days I am moving home for 3 months. I think about it and cry. I just want to stay here! What is wrong with me?

I sometimes wish that we could both get so drunk together that I could work up the courage to ask you if there is any chance of us being together...but I am afraid of the answer.

I'm starting to doubt that two people can actually stay happily married to one another for the rest of their lives. I always believed that I would fall in love, get married, have babies, and live happily ever after. Unfortunately, I'm not sure "happily ever after" exists. I'm scared that I'll end up alone, but even more scared I'll end up in an unhappy relationship.

I know I need to finish these assignments for the class I need to graduate but I just cannot concentrate on them. They're already late and I'm already setting myself up for having to take another class after I walk next Sunday.

my parents got divorced and my mom moved to a different house. i have told people who are my friends in Chapel Hill but know nothing of my life at home. I haven't told one person who I know from home, not even my best friends. It's like i can't do it. I was always "that girl" with the perfect life. Nothing is the same anymore.

I often wonder who, if anyone, would be at my funeral.

I cried in my car in a public parking lot secretly hoping you would walk by and see.

I miss you.

I can't call because you're supposed to be the one to call me first and apologize. I want to forgive you, and all I want is for you to say "I"m sorry." It's been four days. I'm so scared this is going to be over.

I know it's stupid and childish.
I know it's probably the dumbest and most juvenile thing you've ever heard and could never understand. Believe me, sometimes I do too. Maybe that's why I have so much trouble telling you this to your face. But I can't help it. I get jealous that you write on her facebook wall wishing her a good day and throwing in an inside joke. I hate it that you put a picture of you and him as your profile picture. I don't need you to advertise our friendship. But I would like some affirmation every now and then. But, it's more than that. It hurts my feelings that you put so much effort and feeling into your friendships with other people and not me; your "best friend". Maybe i'll say goodbye this time and mean it.

I'm so stressed about exams. But now I can't even concentrate on being stressed about exams.

Today, my dad told me that my mom has breast cancer. All I can think about is all the horrible things that could be ahead. I'm so scared. And the worst part is, I can't talk to her about it. She doesn't want me to know, so my dad says I have to keep it a secret. How can I keep it a secret when I just want to call her right now and tell her that I love her, but if I do that for no reason, she'll know that I know.

I wish he had just waited a few days to tell me so I could concentrate on school things and enjoy my birthday. I don't blame him, I know it's worrying him too, so I'm sure he just needed someone to talk to.

i hope that guy who walked right by me while i struggled to carry my things down the stairs breaks his leg. why don't people offer to help anymore?

The guy I'm with gives me the BEST SEX OF MY LIFE!!! Seriously I want to tell everyone and make them all jealous.

The parking attendant at Cobb deck totally hit on me today, and I flirted back even though he was like 15 years older than me. :)

I got a D in two of my classes this semester. I've never seen a D staring back at me before. Grad schools will never look at me now with this on my transcript. I think I'm going to be sick.

I don't know what to do.

I'm about to graduate a virgin. That is what I wanted; however, I can't help but feel like society judges me for it.

"Taking a break" in a relationship has got to be the dumbest idea I've ever heard of. I've known for years that it never works out.

So why did we do it?

I had 30mins to do some sort of studying before my last final. Instead, I masturbated to hentai anime porn. At least I won't be crazy horny during my exam now though.

sorry i have loud lesbian sex with my girlfriend on such a quiet hall.

i just can't help myself.

i would have kissed you last night if i didn't leave. i even had a dream about the way the night would have gone if i had stayed.

i still want to kiss you this morning.

i still have a boyfriend this morning, too.

i know we are just friends, but i can't help but imagine how amazing it would be to make love with you

i know how close you would hold me...

The summer is coming and I know im going to cheat on you. I don't feel bad though, cause you will probably cheat on me 2. Please just dont let me find out.

i hate how black people talk

I masturbated while watching Grey's Anatomy last night.


I can't wait to tell you!!

I feel like rooming together has ruined our friendship. I apologize for anything I may have to done to contribute to that but when are you going to apologize to me?

i had a near perfect gpa until my senior year. now i've screwed it up and i'm afraid to apply to grad school because i'm afraid i'll never get in.

I'm not sure why I did it...maybe it was because I was trying to see if there ever could be something there again...fuck.

We're living together, we've been together for three years, and I don't know if I'll ever think we're right for each other. And I'll never say it.

I checked my grades. I failed my open note exam.
And while I was taking it, I knew my answers weren't correct, but I didn't know what else to do.

It's funny how you're one of my best friends and we've talked about our love life problems over the past couple years. Funny because I'm just now realizing that you're the one I really want.

I hate drinking. Seriously, I don't like alcohol. I hate the way it tastes and smells. But sometimes, I wish I could get just a little tipsy and relax and not be so damn cautious all the time.

I used to hate that you watched porn...now I find myself getting into it too....

Comment here to submit a secret 5/3/08

I really like you and most of the time I don't doubt that you feel the same way. But sometimes I'm afraid that I'm just your rebound...

While I'm sad to be leaving Chapel Hill, I feel like graduating is giving me the freedom to do WHATEVER I want my last two weeks here.

and by WHATEVER I mean WHOEVER...

I wish I felt like that I mean more to people.

I wish I had a legitimate relationship.

I wish I didn't fantasize so much about my married friend.

I intentionally scheduled a date for tonight, your birthday, with a gorgeous, intelligent, PERFECT guy, in the hopes that I can forget we were supposed to spend tonight together.

But part of me is praying I run into you while we're out, just so you can see what you're missing.

I'm not surprised you didn't call. I'm not sure if that's because of him or because of you. Either way, I guess it doesn't matter.

I am starting to think it's me, not them.

rooming with my best friend this year has made me hate him. and i can't wait for him to leave. but then i will have no friends.

I thought this was a smart school. It pisses me off how practically everyone I meet is actually not very intelligent, unaware of anything around them, and absorbed in stupid things like tv shows and trivial nonsense. The only smart people I've met here are grad students and professors.

I thought I was empty inside. Then I fell in love this year. Twice. I was rejected and my heart was broken. Twice. Now I feel less than empty.

I am sincerely afraid I have lost the ability to care about other people.

So you had me falling for you and ended it because the distance was too hard. I looked on your profile and saw you online twice today, but you didn't say hi either time. You deleted our pictures from your profile - the ones you took, but kept the ones of your ex. I really don't know what to do when we both say we care a lot about each other and you still don't want to continue this. I feel so empty and broken inside and can't concentrate on anything else. Perfect timing for finals?

I would rather watch tv in bed than do anything else. I'm afraid I will turn into a sloth when I graduate =/

I have always had a crush on you from the moment we first met. Now I consider you my best friend. I just don't want to ruin that by admitting my true feelings for you. I think I could live with this secret the rest of my life as long as I could be close to you.

Every weekend my girlfriend and I have lesbian sex in my dorm room. I'm really sorry for those of you on my hall who hear us, but it's so good I can't help it.

I honestly don't think I care who wins the Presidential election. It's my right to be apathetic too.

Your penis is perfect.

i don't understand why the hell you still want to talk to me when you know how i feel. you're playing games with me.

Just about everyday I post fake responses on juicycampus cursing people and calling them stupid whores and such. I never know the person I am insulting, but if they seem like a good person from the post, I enjoy insulting them even more. I laugh imagining how bad they must feel after discovering "someone" thinks they are a slut or a bad person.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/2/08

This is the first summer we won't spend together. It has ALWAYS been you, and I'm going to miss you so much.

You broke me. I'm so glad you're finally graduating and leaving.

The only thing that college has done for me is make me completely unmotivated, fat and unhappy. I lie when I say I'm sad it's going by so fast. I am in hell, and I hope to God that there is something better out there for me.

You know how as kids, we played "dress-up" and acted like adults?

I'm about to graduate and yet, I still feel like I'm just a little kid, only pretending to be an adult.

I'm so scared people will find out that I really have no idea what I'm supposed to do as an adult.

I'm afraid my friends think I'm emotionally unstable and weak.

I should have studied last night - but instead I had the best sex I've ever had!!!! It was so worth it.

I look down on religious people.

Almost every day this year I have passed by that guy who drives the little cart around to take injured people to class. He is just sitting there... I always wonder if he hates his job or loves the fact that he just has to sit there. If he hates it, I feel sorry for him cause he looks like a really nice guy and helps people out.. I just hope he doesn't hate it....

I'm scared that my major isn't right for me and I just figured this out too late. Even worse, I'm scared that I'll get stuck doing a job I hate.

I have an exam in three hours. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, and studied for an exam I have on Monday, because I'd rather fail this exam and make this professor look bad than try to do well and make it look like his class was anything more than a joke. I wish everyone else would do the same, because the class evaluations aren't good enough.

Every time I go to the UL I feel like I have some purpose in mind; I'm going to do some work, read for the test I have coming up, get ahead. Then I get in, sit down and realize this is the last place I want to be. 5 hours later and nothing to show for it I still feel that way. Sometimes I'll see a friend sealed off in a cubby studying. I'll go say hi and ask how things are going but really I just want to say that I hate you for doing something with your life.

Even though I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I still find myself seriously thinking about other people, in terms of what it would be like to date them. I feel really terrible about it and I'll never tell you, but I worry about what this means about me and us.

I'm not sure whether I'm withholding certain details of the truth in order to make it easier on you, me, or just for a bit of excitement. And if I figure out which one it is- I fear it will say more about myself than I'd like to know.

I looked at your facebook today. I knew it was a bad idea, knew it. That didn't stop me. 4 am here I am looking at your pictures from your weekend at the beach. In every one you look so happy with her. You have the same look on your face that you always do in our old pictures. Now I find myself picturing myself in her spot... then I realize it's not me your smiling about. Wait, I was the one who broke up with you wasn't I?

I'm not voting in the primaries.

I take every opportunity to showoff the fact that my family is wealthy. I feel guilty, but I love it too.

i loved your class, i thought the topics we covered were interesting, and i enjoyed the books we read. i would think you were great at teaching, but your tests were complete BS. becuase i actually studied and read the books for your final and still made a bad grade, i have come to the conclusion that you are a horrible professor.

also, i know you will never read this, but i'm so close to telling you this that i just had to vent.

Only trust my handshake -- my signature is worthless.

I voted for Hillary Clinton in the Primary...

Not because she's a woman.
Not because she's white.
I just think she's smarter than Obama.

The moment you leave, I'm deleting you from my Facebook. I know that isn't really threatening, but I think it will relay the knowledge that I hated you as a roommate and dread the possibility of living with someone just like you next semester...

Oh, and I have actively killed you in my mind many many times. And I don't regret it.

I could hear the people one door over having sex twice this week and it really turned me on.

Comment here to submit a secret 5/1/08